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I guess what it comes down to is, if you know it's your own internal perception of being exposed and vulnerable than the issue rather than a fear of consequence, can you push through that again like you did with your mom and therapist and be uncomfortable for a little while for a long term benefit? That's a big thing, but you stepped up and did it anyway because it would help you in the long term. You embraced that vulnerability by coming out to your mom and your therapist. That's totally natural, but also remember to be proud of what you've already done.
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It's easy to shy away from situations that make us feel vulnerable and exposed. It is a hugely personal thing, it's OK to feel vulnerable, I understand where you're coming from for sure. It took me a little while to do it honestly. I remember when I came out, I KNEW my family would be fine with it (and they were) but there was still a part of me that worried. I totally get it! It is a big thing for some people, there's absolutely no shame in that. But I guess my problem is obviously that this is a really hard thing for me to tell anyone because I feel vulnerable and emotionally exhausted by even thinking of coming out.
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I know my brother is accepting of LGBT people because he is literally gay. So, the reason why coming out is a big deal for me is because of the way that I feel, not necessarily how my brother would feel. And I think that I would feel very paranoid and scared that my loved ones would find out that I was dating someone of the same gender before I was ready. i decided to tell my mom and therapist I am queer (meaning, I will date someone of the same gender as me) because I didn’t want it to feel like I was keeping a “secret” if I dated someone. The idea of coming out to my mom and therapist (before I even came out to them) made me feel anxious and uncomfortable because I wish that being queer didn’t feel like a big deal in that way. I felt like it made me feel vulnerable and very emotionally drained. The reason why I hesitate coming out to my brother is the same reason why I hesitated when I came out to my mom and my therapist. Yes he is in the same area and said he uses Tinder sometimes. What if my brother finds my profile and finds out that I am queer? I feel like it would be uncomfortable for me because I wouldn’t want him to find out on his own that way. I REALLY want that again with someone new. And I have only ever cuddled and kissed one guy (the guy I was in a romantic relationship for 3 weeks in November). I never seriously dated anyone before, actually. I want someone to cuddle with again and I want that overwhelming feeling of my heart sinking in my chest in the best way. So… I wanna start using a dating app to find a new romance and see what happens. Anyway, I also live in big a city on a college campus and I joined a Queer club, so people there know I am queer. I was in a romantic relationship with a guy but it was brief and not serious, but it left me craving for a new romance (this relationship was back in November and lasted 3 weeks). I only came out to my mom (out of everyone in my family / friends), so she is the only person who knows other than my therapist and a small group of people at my university. My brother is queer and I think he expects that I am queer as well but I haven’t actually come out to him yet. Posts that violate these rules but are interesting (a personal vlog from a Tuareg couple, a selfie taken with the Queen, etc.) are encouraged, but subject to removal at discretion.